New Dreads

My family went to the Good Vibrations Unschooling Conference in San Diego, CA last weekend. That is an entire blog entry by itself, and I'll have to do that one later. An amazing, life altering few days...really.

While we were in San Diego, my new friend Tara  (@OrganicSister) gave me dreadlocks!

Tara sectioned off my hair.

(picture from here)

She back-combed and palm rolled each section.

(picture from here)

It *really*, *REALLY* hurt at times.

About two hours in...

(picture from here)

We had a regular audience that would stop by and see how far along we were.

Dreading and breastfeeding L(14m), with two of my other kids nearby.

We are near the hotel pool.

That night, we attempted to count how many dreads there are...and we *think* 57.

It took us 7-8 hours that first day to get all of the dreads in.

From what I hear, that's pretty fast...

Two days later, we began to tighten any dreads that had come a little loose.

This is me, keeping the tightened and the untightened separated overnight.

After tightening them all up, here's me (on the right), with @OrganicSister (left), and @aenclade (center--another unschooling mama twitter friend). 

(picture from here)

When I left the conference on Sunday, this is what the new dreads looked like!

Here are the new dreads at about 6 days old...

WHY? Why did I get dreads? For me, it's not religious or meaningful...I just wanted a low-maintenance hairstyle. I hate getting my hair cut, styling, any of that stuff. I am the queen of get out of the shower and throw my hair into a bun (no brushing or drying first). I've thought about getting dreads for a few months now, and then I read Tara's blog post on her dreads. When I expressed an interest in getting them, Tara offered to do them for me at the conference. Yes, they did take a total of about 10 hours to put in...and they will require some special care for the next few months (or whatever)...but in the end, I believe that they will be low-maintenance. And, I plan on keeping them forever...

Summer Hopscotch

In Arizona in the summer, you have to find creative ways to play inside (think winter in New England...you stay inside almost all winter...). Here's what we did today (I can't take credit for the idea...a few of our friends have done something similar):

We laid out numbers on the tile floor with painters' tape! 

That's G & L running around.

(this view is looking down from the loft)

G playing "hopscotch" (he called it this, even though it's not exactly the right pattern).

Nursling

My view of little L (13m) nursing today.

...and her tiny little feet, too.

Why "Autodidact Mama"?

au⋅to⋅di⋅dact [aw-toh-dahy-dakt]: a person who has learned a subject without the benefit of a teacher or formal education; a self-taught person. (found here)  (and, for the record...I don't like the word "benefit" in this definition...)


My ID, AutodidactMama, has two meanings to me:

*The way that I parent has almost nothing in common with how I was parented/raised. I have taught myself how to be the mother that my children need and deserve. I am an autodidactic mama.

*I live with four children, who are autodidacts. I am the mama of autodidacts.

See? Pretty simple. :0)

"Typical" Day

As any unschooler knows, there's no "typical" day.

Here's what went on in our house today:

We all woke up around 7am, when G announced that the sun was awake. C got ready for work, I made coffee, N & S ate crackers, G ate "nunny nut chee-woes", and L sat in her booster seat working on an apple. C left for work.

*L nursed while I checked my email and twitter on my iTouch.

*N & S played on the computer (Dino Squad, I think?).

*G set up train tracks that ran the length of the living room.

*L threw things in the trash.

*G watched something on PBS.

*I set up my Google reader!

*N, S, & G made another tent in the livingroom (we moved the couches just for this purpose).

*L filled a small bag with blocks, toy food, and spoons from the kitchen drawer.

*I attempted to clean the kitchen...and just ran the dishwasher instead.

*We all watched Pink Panther together.

*S made a paper pterodactyl.

*N & S argued about the difference between a pterodactyl and a pteranodon (??).

*G colored on the table, right next to where the piece of paper was.

*N played Wii (I have no clue what game), while S & G watched him. 

*G made ramps for his cars with items from our recycling bin.

*N, S & G made an obstacle course for L in the playroom.

*We went to make cookies, and realized that we didn't have enough ingredients.

*I attempted to read, but L didn't want me holding a book.

*L took apart the train track that G had set up.

*G threw a train at L.

*L laughed and ran away from G...squealing.

*N & I played "Go Fish" with "Uno" cards...and then played "Uno".

*L played with her own set of cards nearby.

*G watched Pink Panther (his obsession right now) and took a nap.

*N & S played in the playroom quietly.

*L napped.

*I tried to watch "Knowing" (I finally finished it tonight...it only took 3 days to watch).

*L & N played in the kitchen cupboards.

*Everyone took a bath (just to play in the water).

*G made us all goodies at the play kitchen.

*We all played "store", using money that they boys made.

*S told me, "I'm overbudget...that means I'm out of money."

*S & L both got fevers and weren't feeling well...we all talked about getting sick & being healthy.

*N, S & I started to write a book together.

*S played with a calculator.

*N randomly asked me how to spell words that he heard in his game or on TV.

Throw in lots of snacks, a few meals, many breastfeeding sessions, lots of hugs and kisses......

And that's some of our unschooling day...today. We didn't leave the house, it was well over 100*F out.

I'm not the type of "homeschooler" who looks at what we do and tries to break it down into "educational subjects". If you feel the need to see if we "covered" certain "subjects", go ahead. I'm certain that my kids learned more today than their peers did at school. But, more important than learning...they did their own thing, followed their own hearts/desires, and are happy.

We are just living our lives...

Random Pics 2

S made a pterodactyl today out of paper.

C vacuuming with L on his back.

I'm pretty sure that's S running by.

And, that's me off to the left.

Main Goal: Happy Kids

"The main goal is raising happy kids. Everything else is a bonus." 

~Sarah Anderson-Thimmes (found here)

As a "radical unschooler", this quote has a much deeper meaning to me than it does to most parents, I think.

To me, it means literally what it says...EVERYthing else is a bonus. Reading, writing, spelling, math skills, sports ability, socialization, speaking skills, swimming, computer literacy, science knowledge, tooth-brushing skills, sleeping patterns...EVERYthing. If my children are happy now--and as adults--then we have done our job as their parents.

Happiness is knowing that your parents love and support you unconditionally. Happiness is knowing that your parents will read you that book...whenever you want. Happiness is knowing that your parents trust that YOU know what your needs and wants are. Happiness is knowing that your mom will make you cookies when you ask...and she won't limit how many you eat. Happiness is knowing that your parents actually LIKE having you around. Happiness is knowing that if you want to be left alone, you will be. Happiness is trusting that whatever passion you have, you are free to run after it with all of your heart. Happiness is knowing that YOU are in charge of YOUR life. Happiness is knowing and trusting that you can do ANYthing that YOU want to do.

If a child WANTS to learn/do anything else (the items listed above--and many, many more), then they will. Because they want to, and they have decided that it's something that they want.

I have come to the point in our unschooling journey where I can honestly say that if my children don't learn how to read, then that's okay. I happen to love reading, and I'd love to share that passion with my children. I really think that their lives would be easier, and perhaps more enjoyable, if they learn how to read...but that's not my choice. It's not my life.

If our children are happy now--and in the future--then we have done our job.

Bathtime!

All of the kids wanted to take baths tonight.

I got to "relax" in the tub first, listening to all 4 kids beg for their chance. I got maybe 5 minutes "alone". Big messes and fights occur when they are all in the tub together, so they each get to get in with me individually.

S(5) got to get in first, because he had asked first. He had been making a pirate ship all day, and was ready to test it out in the tub. It was made from an old lid from a take-out container that we've hung onto, with two straws sticking up as masts, and construction paper taped on as sails. He was quite pleased when the boat floated, and he put in a Lego pirate that he made. It still floated. He blew on the sails, and the ship sailed and turned. All was well. And then the "salami" (tsunami) hit. The ship filled with water and still floated! S screamed, "Lego Man overboard!!" as his little Lego pirate floated away. Lego pirate swam back to the ship, dumped out the water (must have been a very strong pirate?), and S noted that "maybe construction paper isn't the goodest sail, 'cuz it gets wet." 

N(7) got in next, and talked S into letting him play with the pirate ship and Lego pirate. No salamis hit the ship this time, but the pirate did lose his legs when he slammed into the rocks (aka: the side of the tub). No fear, N said that the pirate was also a doctor and he "could put his own legs back on."

G(3) fell into the tub (literally) for his turn, and S said that he couldn't play with the ship or pirate. G happily played with washcloths, and became "Super G!" using one as a cape. Super G had "scared off the pirate" and was in charge of pouring water from one cup to another. Apparently, this is an important job. Super G got to let the water drain out of the tub, and he saved every object that headed toward the "hole".

When all of the water was drained, it was L(13m)'s turn. She likes to sit in an empty tub, and have the water trickling down from the faucet. She filled up the cups, sucked on washcloths, and played with a comb for a bit, and then told me that she was done.

Eliminating Elimination

We have eliminated the Elimination Diet. The kids weren't on-board anymore--and honestly, neither am I. None of our food allergies are life-threatening (pork and nitrates might cause an asthma attack for S, but that's about it), and it's just too much to keep track of.

When doing the Elimination Diet, we hoped for a few results:

*We hoped that L's rash would go away (she has some funky rash spots on her legs).

*We hoped that N & S would be able to remain dry at night, and not wet the bed (for some people, eliminating dairy helps with this).

*We hoped that G would stop waking with night terrors, and just waking to scream--he does both (again, eliminating dairy helps some kids).

*We hoped that C (husband) and I would just feel better in general (the kids said they felt "fine" before).

*We hoped that the dark circles that all 4 kids have under their eyes would go away.

None of these things happened.

Here's what did happen:

*L's rash improved quite dramatically for the first two days. Then it started to look bad again. Yesterday, it looked worse than a week ago.

*There was no change in N & S staying dry.

*G woke up screaming still, but he was screaming, "Nunny Nut Che-woes!!" (his favorite cereal that he wasn't eating anymore).

*C and I were just stressed from the whole ordeal.

*There was no change in the dark circles under the kids' eyes.

*Everyone was grumpy and hungry.

Before we began the Elimination Diet last week, the older kids were on-board with the plan. As the week wore on, they became more off-board. This weekend, we all decided that it just wasn't worth it, and ordered pizza.

Random Pics

L's little feet in my flip-flops.

L playing with the soft doll house that she got for her 1st birthday.

Our new tent, partially set up in our living room.

L before bed...she picked out her bathing suit as jammies.

S setting up puppet show. L "helping".

N & S putting on puppet show.

N & S playing at computer.

I guess I'll have to search for some pictures that G is in! 

Oatmeal Raisin Cookies

We have been desperately trying to find a good cookie recipe (that doesn't contain any of our allergens). Here's one that we found months ago, and have been tweaking. It's pretty darn yummy.

Oatmeal Raisin Cookies

(adapted from "The Whole Foods Allergy Cookbook" by Cybele Pascal)

Wet Ingredients:

1/2 c Spectrum organic shortening

1/4 c blackstrap molasses

1/4 c maple syrup

1/4 c agave nectar

Dry Ingredients:

1/2 c brown rice flour

3/4 c oat flour*

2 Tbsp milled flax seed

1/4 tsp sea salt

1/2 tsp cinnamon

1/2 tsp baking soda

1 tsp aluminum-free baking powder

Other Ingredients:

1 c oats*

1/2 c raisins (dried cranberries work, too)

Preheat oven 350*F.

Mix together "Wet Ingredients". 

In different bowl, mix together "Dry Ingredients".

Stir dry into wet.

Add in "Other Ingredients".

Use regular kitchen spoon to spoon lumps onto lightly greased cookie sheet.

Cook 12 min.

Let cookies cool on sheet before removing!!!

*If you are not eating gluten, make sure your oat flour and oats are gluten-free.

Allergen Avoidance

We are getting ready avoid all of our food allergens this week. 

I posted a few days ago about all of the foods that at least one person in the house is allergic to...it's a big list. The four (out of six) of us who have been tested and "treated" make up that list. We think that the "treatments" aren't "holding", so we are just going to NOT eat ANY of the foods on that list, starting tomorrow. I can't possibly remember who is allergic to what, so we are ALL going to avoid ALL of the foods on the list.

I have my suspicions about the food allergies of the other two who haven't been tested yet...I think that they will both have dairy on their lists.

It's going to be a tough few days around here, I think....wish us luck. Please.

Unschooling Karate?

We were all getting ready to head out this morning...N had basketball, S had his Martial Arts class. 

S casually said, "I don't want to go to karate anymore." After talking about it for awhile, he said that it WAS fun, but that he didn't want to do a class that I couldn't stay for. We talked about how the instructors were strangers right now, but that they wouldn't be by the time I would start to leave the room. He said that he wouldn't ever feel comfortable enough for me to leave.

Then, he added that the class had too many rules, anyway. "I'll just learn karate on my own," he said in a happy voice, "and you can do it with me!"

The Big List (so far)...

I've mentioned that we have lots of food allergies...

A year ago, I would have told you that none of us (my immediate family) had any food allergies. Shortly after L was born, her skin and abdomen were showing signs that she might be allergic to something that I was eating (she was an exclusively breastfeeding infant). L had her food allergies tested, and she was allergic to a whole list of foods.

Since then, my husband, S, and I have all been tested for our food allergies. So, four out of the six of us have had our food allergies tested...the other two (N & G) will be tested soon. Since it's nearly impossible for me to remember everyone's lists (most are quite long), I'm compiling it into one big list of foods that I'm not buying anymore (or bringing into the house).

I am literally learning how to cook and eat all over again.

Here's what we have on the food allergy list so far:

*Dairy (cow's milk, albumin, casein, lactose)

*Whey Protein

*Egg

*Soy (bean, milk, tofu)

*Peanut

*Pecan

*Pistachio

*Pine Nut

*Walnut

*Cashew

*Sunflower Seed

*Coconut

*Banana

*Crab Apple

*Raspberry (black & red)

*Tomato

*Potato

*Corn (yellow)

*Wheat

*Wild Rice

*Buffalo

*Pork

*Tuna Fish

*Trout

*Aspartame

*High Fructose Corn Syrup

*Honey

*Sugar (cane)

*Sunflower Oil

*Soy Sauce

*Sodium Fluoride

*Sodium Nitrate

*Sodium Nitrite

*Sodium Sulfite

*Food Dyes

Kung Fu S

S(5) has wanted to take karate for YEARS. Seeing "Kung Fu Panda" sealed it for him...he decided that when he turned 5, he would take karate classes. (He came up with that age on his own...) 

We began investigating Martial Arts schools/classes a few months ago, but didn't really want to commit to any contracts or anything. I found that our city's rec department offered a 6-week Martial Arts class! Checked with S, he was excited and wanted to sign up. Great!

This past Saturday was his first class. He couldn't even get to sleep Friday night. We arrived, he was giddy with excitement. He was holding my hand and skipping down the sidewalk. We walked in the door, I said hello to his teacher...and S hid behind me, death grip on my leg, burried his face in my butt, and said, "I'm shy." The teacher gave us a paper and we sat down and waited, S was hugging my arm and had his face buried in me. 

The two instructors began to speak to the class, explaining the classes and uniforms and such. Then they said that parents will wait outside during classes (it's a small dance class room with mirrors everywhere...and I could totally see how it might be hard to concentrate)...S grabbed my arm even tighter and started to cry. I quietly talked to him...he didn't want to join in yet...he wanted to stay...but he wanted me to stay too. Broke.My.Heart.

I talked to one of the teachers, and she said that it's completely fine for us to sit and observe until he felt comfortable participating. She told me that they had one student who observed for nearly 12 weeks before he felt comfortable enough. I went back to S (actually, I'm not sure how I even got a few feet away to talk to the teacher!) and told him that we could sit and watch together for now. He liked that idea. He cried for a few more minutes, shaking and holding onto my arm, giving me hugs...and then he was mesmerized by watching the class. 

Class ended, S put his shoes back on, and suction-cupped himself back onto my leg (face in my butt again) as we walked out. I thanked his teachers. S and I walked a few feet away from the door...he held my hand and was skipping again! He talked the whole way to the car, and then the whole drive about how fun karate class was! When we met up with C (aka: Daddy), he was telling him how great and fun it was...and all the stuff they did!

I *think* that he will warm up to the teachers and participate. It's so hard for me to believe that he had fun...but he did! This is totally up to him, but we will keep going and just sit and watch if that's what he wants. 

My Family

I am married to a wonderful man, and we have four beautiful children together. Our first three are boys: N turned 7 in May, S turned 5 in May, G turned 3 in May. Our newest addition is a girl, L, and she turned 1 in June. We are an "attached" family, and we are "radical" unschoolers. There's always room to improve, though, and we work together every day to become more harmonious and happy.

We have moved around quite a bit...from AZ to NM to NY to AZ. We finally settled into a house in the Phoenix area (after moving 3 times in the past year), and plan to be here for a while...although we'd love to move back to NM at some point.

Banana Bread

We have an extensive list of (newly discovered) food allergies/sensitivities in this household, so I am learning how to shop for and feed our family all over again. 

N(7) and I made a banana bread tonight that *almost* meets our new criteria. (I say *almost*, because the baby is allergic to bananas...) It's a really dense pan of bread, and it isn't incredibly sweet...but it's quite yummy, especially with some non-dairy butter substitute on it. Success!

Allergy-Friendly Banana Bread

(kinda based on a recipe from "The Whole Foods Allergy Cookbook" by Cybele Pascal)

1/4 c oil

3/4 c organic agave nectar

4 ripe bananas, mashed

3  tsp Ener-G Egg Replacer mixed with 4 Tbsp enriched rice milk

juice of half a lemon

1/2 tsp cinnamon

1/2 c dried cranberries

1 c oat flour

1 c brown rice flour

3 Tbsp ground flax meal

1 1/2 tsp. aluminum-free baking powder

*Preheat oven to 350*F.

*Mix oil, agave, bananas, egg replacer, lemon juice, cinnamon, and cranberries in bowl.

*In separate bowl, combine remaining ingredients.

*Combine dry ingredients into wet. Mix well.

*Oil square baking dish (8x8? 9x9?), dust w/ either oat or rice flour.

*Pour mixture into baking dish.

*Bake for about 1 hour 20 minutes.

Test

I am new to blogging, this is a test entry.